Just a random thought before bed. I remember when I first reconnected with my siblings, I was 16. I felt like the ugly duckling of the family. My oldest brother was a 22 year old playa, handsome. My second brother was modeling at the time. Tall, tan, etc. And my little brother was just entering highschool, as a little jock. And here I was this dirty, little angsty goth girl. Awkward as hell. And confused with my own sexuality. U name it. I wonder how much of our genetics determines our physical appearance. I know I'm still a bit awkward and odd looking, but I'm 100% more ok with it than I was a few years ago. Did my older brothers go thru the same thing? One thing I really missed out on is growing up with my brothers. We seem so distant. But I think about them all the time. And I'm am aunt now. By blood. Weird thoughts. Time for sleep.
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