reputation

Its funny how people make things happen in their own minds to justify what is going on in their lives.

Its also funny how quickly people are to assume things that they know very little about.

I have had the reputation of a "Man stealer" for a very long time. Almost 10 years (Im 22) so think about that for a second, and then think about our society. Kinda sad right? Only 13 years old and already pegged as someone who forces men away from the person that "trapped" them into their delusional pre-teen back woods, backwards mentality. "I know that we are only 13 but we are dating, so that means we will get married someday, and have babies!" and the reality is (for that poor girl) is that she will end up very unhappy, because that is NOT how the majority of the world works, AND there is no "right or wrong way to live" I could go more into this concept (sex before marriage, same sex marriage, divorce, etc) These traditional theories are, and have been outdated. very outdated. We just don't get hitched at 13 anymore people, so stop teaching your children that they "must find a man" or we will end up with more reality TV shows about teen pregnancy. OBVIOUSLY WE ARE ALL DOING SOMETHING WRONG!

But anyway let me tell you how this all is a part of my life and my experience. For starters I am not from Virginia, I have lived many places, and because of my very bizarre childhood (consisting of a very wild mother who wanted to have a traditional family sooo bad but had zero concept on how to actually make that happen correctly, thus resulting in a slew of failed marriages and left behind family *all the children* and then growing up with a single father and watching him navigate through the crazy dating scene and seriously seeing first hand how CRAZY women can be) I have a very unique perspective on things like relationships, marriage, babies, families and the like. Because of this perspective I have also researched marriages and traditions from other countries to get an idea of how these ideas and concepts come about. I will say this, we live in a very crazy world, ruled by very crazy people.

So back to me at 13 years old, because that is when it all started, I became a "Man stealer". I was in 7th grade, and had gone to some dances with some boys, and done the whole "we're dating because we are holding hands" thing, but never had a serious boyfriend *i use that term lightly..because how fucking serious can you be at 13 right?* anyway, I met this boy, we'll call him curls because he had beautiful black curls. We started dating, and since i was a prude that essentially meant we ate lunch together. Unfortunately Curls had a secret, or not so secret admirer, whom was convinced that curls was her man. And in her defense curls was a charmer, so she might have thought he was actually interested in her, until I came along and charmed his fucking pants off! (lol) But he wasn't actually interested in her otherwise he would not have asked me out. make sense? Well this girl holds some serious grudges. serious. She HATED me from there on out, and STILL has a problem with me. In fact I thought she had gotten over it when she added me on FB a year ago, only to wake up to a HUGE comment on one of my photos where she had gone off about how I was a freak, and would always be a freak and someday I will be fat and ugly like the rest of the world. (can you see how insane that is?) The problem is that same scenario happened again in highschool, where she was pining over some dude, and I met him (unaware that she had it for him) and he asked me out. This is one girl out of 3 girls who has had this idea in their head that I purposing track down the men they are into just to distract them away from said girl. Im sure its infuriating, but honestly who has time for that?

So moving on to "where is she now?" Well she is living in some county somewhere, engaged to her best friends baby daddy. She looks good, she has lost a lot of weight since highschool. But its hilarious that she still thinks Im some kind of super freak.. whatever. When she "took" a man from her best friend while she was pregnant with his child. Ironic huh?

Ok second girl. I had a highschool sweetheart (I liked to date until I met this one kid who I thought was the bizness, so I stopped dating and stayed with this kid for over a year, but since it was high school it was on and off.) Anywho when I first met him he was talking to this chick, we will call her droopy because she is a sad person, never happy, and you can see it in her eyes. poor girl. I remember him telling me about her the first night we met, but he was telling me he wasn't very interested, that they had just been talking. This kid came to my house party the night after we met, got trashed and had to crash at my place. (or my dads place bc we were in highschool) When I took him home the next day, he asked me out. She found out a few days later and was furious. But they weren't together and even if they had been, why would you try to hang on to someone who doesn't want you? These women make no sense. Unfortunately for her, this became a repeat thing for us. And it might be because she was super clingy to her men, or we had the same taste in men, or maybe its because I can talk to men like people, and not animals (ladies we complain that men think of us as objects, well we think of them as pets, so thats no good) Anywho what ever the reason there was another guy later (a few years) who wanted to get with me, but never did. 1. he was with her 2. I wasn't interested but apparently she caught him looking at pictures of me or something so it ended. A year or so after that she was dating a drummer from a band I use to book consistently. Me and the drummer were very good friends, and we started hanging out more that summer because we both had more free time. AND he wanted to spend some time away from her. Just because I have a vagina does not mean every man who wants to hang out with me wants to get some. seriously YOU WOMEN ARE CRAZY. anyway. He started telling me that she was pestering him about kids and marriage, and even set a date for both, and wrote it in sharpie on his wall and stuff. We were 20, so I told him FUCK THAT. it was obviously Something he did not want. Or we wouldn't be all distant and telling his friends about it. So why push him? If you really love him, you would make a compromise. Come on people, its not hard. Well he ended up breaking up with her, you can guess who got blamed for it. Go figure. However we never dated.

Where is she now? Don't know Don't care. Last time I heard about her, I had a coworker who was friends with her in highschool, and gave me some perspective on her personality. She desperately needed to be needed, and wanted. And HAD to fit in all the time. Like I said, poor girl.

Next we come to my highschool sweetheart and his current wife and mother to be. That is a huge story with lots of emotional ties and heartache between us, but the moral of that story is, he is happy because he is SAFE with her. He has come to me multiple times through out their relationship from dating, to engagement, to marriage, to baby, expressing that he is not happy and wants to end it with her because he is bored and not ready for this life. He doesn't want to do this the rest of his life. And I tell him what I tell anybody. If you want to be free, you are free. Just do it. Now he has put a baby in her, it will be harder. I have cut all ties of communication with her and him because I AM NOT going to get blamed for that marriage falling apart. I am not going to have some crazy women telling her child that another women broke up their marriage. HONESTLY if your marriage is that fragile, something is wrong. Does anyone else see that? If your husband is out seeking comfort from his ex from highschool, making passes and flirting something is wrong.

And yes I know this says a lot about my character, most people would tell me I shouldn't be talking to my ex's or "You shouldn't let them hit on you, they are just coming to you because they need an outlet" or whatever. Some people push it as far as being like "I bet they come to you because they think you can be the girl on the side, your laid back and don't demand commitment" nonsense.

Small fact about me, I lost my virginity senior year, and can count my partners on two hands. so eat me if you think Im loose.

SO we come to the present. Where yet another women is blaming me for the end of her marriage. which in reality ended well before I came into the picture, romantically or not. That marriage was over when I first met my SO. Most people can see that, and most people are ok with other people doing what they want to be happy. But like I said, we are raising people to be obsessive and hang on to traditional morals that don't apply to modern day society. Is anyone getting this? WE ARE OUR OWN PROBLEM. So stop.